Have you ever been forced to fall pregnant? Have you had a partner refuse using condoms/contraception with the intention of impregnating you?
A study recently published in Contraception, says this practice is disturbingly rife. You know this man- he is the man who is infected but won't use a condom, the man who promises to "pull out", the man who destroys your contraception so he can own you , shackle you to him through having his baby. A man who is neglectful of your sexual health and rights.
It is yet another form of abuse to which women are subjected- when will it ever be enough? Is there any one area of women's lives and bodies that are truly her private space? Women are abused on many interesectional levels - not just gender but she may be without money, without skills as well as disabled - look at how vulnerable women are in the world.
Then how come on my radio show with Redi today it was men calling in to speak of their reproductive abuse by women? Where were the voices of women? They are silenced by their ongoing fear of admission of any form of abuse. Which is why I shall always be vocal. I imagine that there is just one woman a week who will get it that she is an abusive relationship of whatever kind and this will be the beginning of an awareness that will , over time, lead her to freedom.
I am not insensitive to the reproductive abuse men experience, the violation of their sexual rights, at the hands of women - it is sneaky, I do not feel proud of my sistahs who resort to this. However men are not the victims here - women usually are. Men know to wear condoms so they remain in control of the reproductive truths of penetration. Women do this for a variety of reasons, not least is her economic need to be supported in her quest to have a child- economic gender inequality is real, and also her socialised need to have a man around in the hope he will give her a better life and care for her kids. How sad is that - considering that men are seldom around. When will we women learn this trick burdens us even further?
Buy condoms (http://www.dreve.co.za/shop/lubes-moisturizers-and-condoms/pasante-warming-cooling-sensations-12s.html) and use them.
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