You cannot wish his/her kids away so if you do  not like kids, are done with childrearing,   or do not want any , best to not even go on the first date. Kids make a huge difference to dating.

I offer you some helpful honest tips for dating people with children:

*  Young children will always come first- and if they do not , what kind of a parent are they?

*  Children of all ages may always come first - can you manage a person who has not placed enough boundaries resulting in  adult children still controlling and manipulating mom/dad's movement including dating behaviour?

* Be aware on first dates how she /he responds to children/ex partners calls/text messages whilst on a date with you - this will give you a good idea what you are in for.

* If all he/she speaks about on your first few dates is children then know this is their primary role and you may well be expected to fill in "daddy"/"mommy" slot as your primary contribution.

* If she/he holds back on you meeting kids, know this is a sensible parent.

* If she keeps you secret once your relationship is solid and committed , then question what's up with the kids that you are not being invited to met them.

* Be very mindful of where and how you have sex with kids in a house. It is not a good idea to meet kids for the first time (ever actually) in your underwear or naked.

*Be respectful to kids whose parent you are dating- you may not be the first frog the parent has had to kiss, so forgive them if they are cynical, distant and watching you.

* It is not  a good idea to seduce the kids with gifts, trips, promises of more as  a means of getting close or attached to their parent- its a cheap shot that may hurt kids and backfire on all of you.

* Hold back as long as possible from introducing your kids to her kids.

Dating  a person with kids means being very responsible and adult as it is not just your ego and heart on the line but a number of vulnerable kids.

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