Clinical FAQ

Recently my hubby went on a businesds trip.
I found a slip in his suitcase for condoms and a durex vibrating finger tip.
I confronted him. He said it was for his own fantasy and wanted another feeling other than his own hand while masturbating.  The vibrator he apparently said was to try his own anal stimulation.....
A few days later there was another bill in the boot for Champagne the same night from the hotel!!!
Once again I confronted him and he said it was for me, it was a present he was to bring home for me?  Infact, he said it was in his office fridge and sent me amms picture of it.  I never got the champagne as we were fighting that morning he came back so he put it in his office fridge.
Now I am very very confused.....
the story sounds awfully suspicious but he has managed to make me believe him!!!!!
Time has passed and all is good at home, however........my mind continually haunts me.....
Please reply.

Dr.Eve Answers:

I make it a rule of thumb to give women permission to go with their gut feeling. I know this is so non- scientific but I think in the kind of situation that you describe, gut feeling works. I wonder if there have been other "suspicious" kinds of behaviour in the past or if this is your first touch of unsafety in your marriage. Unfortunately you will continue being suspicious as his behaviour was highly unusual - or perhaps you never noticed before.. Either way something called "trust" has been shattered in your marriage. It is so horrid living with lack of trust that it turns into a big monster - and even if your husband's behaviour was completely as he says it was- innocent- the seed is with you. I suggest you tell him how you feel as it will eat you up, as he may be completely unaware of how you feel. You may start avoiding sex, distancing from him as you feel the lack of trust. It's not fair to him so tell him and if you still feel unsettled, suggest therapy, couple therapy. Tame this monster before it takes over your marriage.