I am in lock down with my cheating partner

A week into lock down and you notice that your usually shopping averse husband, is jumping at the opportunity to buy essentials at the grocery store. You also become aware that these shopping trips are pretty lengthy. Whilst thanking him for his enthusiasm and helpfulness, you wonder is it just corona virus craziness that has caused this change in his…

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You want me to do what ??!!! Corona Virus lockdown

  Spending 3 weeks in lockdown with  a known  partner either fills  the heart with forgotten  butterflies or dread. It could also mean moving in with a new person as partners who do not live together cannot see each other in person .   You choose this over 3 weeks of separation . Perhaps your long distance lover decides  to…

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Pornography consumption : how much does it influence your sexual expectations and behaviour?

At the outset I state that this is not a blog about the harm/benefits of pornography consumption . Rather this is a matter of fact invitation for you to consider whether or not your porn consumption influences your real life sexual activity, either alone or with a  partner/s.  And if so, in what way does it do this? I also…

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Non Binary #101

“Do you, personally, identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender?” This is a research question asked of young people in multiple cultures and countries,  And commonly the outcome remains the same, as reported in the book  “Life isn’t binary: on being both, beyond and in-bewteen ” , by Meg-John Barker and Alex Iantaffi Nearly half of young people see themselves…

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Why and How Females Masturbate

Google “how to masturbate” and you will be confronted  with  many guides on “Dating  your down under” , or Touch Yourself. All aimed  at women.  Interspersed are a few guides for men /people with a penis. It implies a silent understanding that men know how to masturbate and do it as part of their male privilege. Im not undermining the…

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Cyber Infidelity : a dishonest form of relationship

It is 11.30pm. He stumbles downstairs to see where his wife is. She is on the couch , immersed in her mobile device. Smiling , giggling.  As she sees him , she quickly , puts her mobile face down . GOTCHA! What follows is not pretty. He feels his gut constrict and he is not sure if he wants to…

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Angry Words are a one way ticket to Gender Based Violence

  Has there ever been a time in your life when you have  got so angry that you ended up hurting someone you care about ? With words, not actions, just words. Words that left you looking around and wondering  out of whose mouth did those words  just come? Once you have returned to emotional regulation, you can be present…

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The best of Dr Eve and Eusebius McKaiser , Radio 702: 2019

  Its 11am Friday morning. The jingle plays “Talking Sex” . I am alert and excited to begin the conversation . During the week my host, Eusebius McKaiser and I have mindfully discussed the topic and  thrown around ideas. We aim to educate, provoke and provide a safe and professional space for listeners. However we can never predict listeners’ response…

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An examination of Friendship, Love and Loneliness

I dedicate this to anyone who has recently fallen in love, has been in love,  or wants to be in love. After all in Western society love is the purest most sublime experience. We situate love before values such as justice, solidarity ,human  rights, kindness and respect, says Mari Luz Esteban, a lecturer in Social Anthropology at the University of…

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My first sexual intercourse experience

Think back to your first sexual intercourse experience. Actually don’t think.. notice the sensations that come up in your body right now: warm glow all over, sudden pelvic  contraction, heart pounding , throat constricting, head throbbing plus plus . Merely checking into your body will be enough to tell you whether or not that first intercourse experience was positive and…

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