Relationship Trauma: Ways to correct the crazy

You simply cannot avoid relationship trauma. Perhaps you’re balking as you read the words “relationship” and “trauma ” in the same sentence.  – or sighing with relief as you resonate with this. After all relationships are supposed to be our ideal spiritual home, the place we strive towards as a sacred ambition . Relationships are supposed to bring us ultimate…

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How Marijuana Effects your Sex Life

Confession : I speak from a place of complete ignorance. I have never had marijuana induced sex. I have tried. Believe me , I have tried. Back in the day , like pre September 2018 when marijuana became legalised  in South Africa, I attempted to smoke weed pre sex. But alas, since I have chosen to  completely avoid smoking nicotine…

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Is your vibe killing your sex life?

It’s one of the great ironies of my world: vibrators are proven to be the most effective means for women  to achieve orgasm . Yet they are seen as less acceptable and desirable than other means of achieving orgasm . Perhaps it is the traditional and patriarchal belief that a man has to be the one who gives his woman…

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The new bedfellows: porn and loneliness

When I watch porn  I have to consciously silence the critic in me and try be present with the purpose of porn :  entertainment to  arouse the many millions who  watch  it daily.  I acknowledge and even enjoy the healthy, recreational   benefits of porn that promotes a positive permissive environment and opportunities for couples to actually communicate their pleasures…

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Are sexual boundaries necessary for teens? Yes but…

Millennials and their younger siblings are living paradoxes:  they are activists, (#Feesmustfall #MeToo)  inspire sociopolitical change, embrace diversity,  and  are tree hugging  ecologically minded. Yet their  vulnerabilities are well documented. They’re experiencing staggering increases in the rates of psychiatric disorders,  loneliness, suicides, and in the USA,  opioid deaths. Their primary form of sexual activity is porn and masturbation and they…

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Singilism and Matrimania : are you guilty of these?

I have ping ponged between being single, attached , single, attached. I have experienced the flood of social  invitations  from other couples when partnered and the social  isolation  from these same friends when single. I am way past wondering why partnered people truly believe that single people have no life and thus available for baby sitting , or  over time…

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How well do you know your partner?

Hello to you in 2019! I am well lit with the magic I am planning for myself in 2019. I invite you to join  me as I explore new ideas on healthy, tech intimacy driven  sexuality and relationships that are the future of sex. However before we move into the future we must linger in the present. Im inviting you…

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If You’re Distressed About Your Sexual Desire, This Could Be Why

“It’s appropriate and healthy to reconsider the role of sexual desire in your own life, value system and in relation to your partnerships.”   On a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being the lowest and 5 the highest, rate how important your sexual desire is to you. Give a reason for this rating. No one is looking over…

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Here’s A Guide On How To Amicably End Intimate Situations

Taking action feels overwhelming. Nowhere is this more abundantly felt than when ending a significant relationship. I work with complex relationships. Clinically this refers to relationships that have trauma associated with them. This might be a fresh trauma, like death, an accident, a job loss or discovery of infidelity. Or it could be a childhood trauma that lingers into adulthood…

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