Category Archives: Relationships

Understanding addictions in Covid-19

  Like me , I am sure you have an opinion about the reinstatement of alcohol in Level 3. I celebrate the return of some of our freedom, mostly the freedom to trade and boost the economy. Like most freedoms, this comes with a cost. And the cost of alcohol is high on the health […]

Children’s Sexual Pleasure: a letter to parents

  Hello Parents,  By now you have got HomeSchooling#101 under your belt. I have heard about the sense of inadequacy you feel around your own  math knowledge , geography and Xhosa. Ive learned that as a parent you have  stretched yourself into new technologies to enable your child to learn online. And you’re exhausted . […]

Sexual Pleasure – this is your human right

  My thoughts are primed on “Pleasure”. There are a number of reasons for this.  The top of head reason is that together with a few of my international colleagues, I am a co-author on an academic paper on “Pleasure and Sexual Health”.  Our focus is on examining how much Pleasure features in your health […]

Painful Sex – OHNUT is here to assist you

The kids are finally asleep, you’re feeling close and connected with him and want to let him know that you’re in the mood for some love making. In a flash the memory of pain gets you to catch your breathe. And you don’t. You don’t let him know that you desire sex with him. You […]

Grief and Journal Writing

  ’CLICK HERE TO SEE ME TALK ABOUT HOW TO JOURNAL’ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbA2Gq1qDHg Grief has many different faces and feelings.  Perhaps you are feeling grief but not identified your feelings as such.  Identifying them as “grief” may in itself bring you some relief.  I know it is always helpful to me.   The most renowned grief […]

How Deep is your Love ?

  There has been no other time in history than now when love presents itself in great abundance . Love of frontline workers providing essential services, health care providers especially, is globally felt as one big heart pumping love to both know and unknown people in the world. Love is  shown to ex partners, to […]

What to do when you can no longer hook up?!

  Remember the days when swiping left or right was a form of entertainment whilst you were on the bus,  the toilet or bored at work? Those days when you could jump from one online chat to another with just your thumb doing all the work. And meeting for a quick hook up during your […]

Tools to understand and manage Intimate Conflict

One tele-therapy session after the other , I notice the tension and dis-ease between 2 people who fill up my screen. In the confines of a screen I get to notice a lot more than when I have the same couple sitting on my therapy couch. I see the fear in their eyes, the tightness […]

237 reasons to have sex ?#CoronaVirus

  “Wow” , you thought, “lockdown with my beloved for 4 weeks” and the sex part of your brain lit up. Suddenly you imagined hours and hours of sex . Sneaky sex, lazy Sunday morning sex midday on  a Wednesday , an opportunity to explore fantasies together, and even experiment sexually, both online and offline. […]

I am in lock down with my cheating partner

A week into lock down and you notice that your usually shopping averse husband, is jumping at the opportunity to buy essentials at the grocery store. You also become aware that these shopping trips are pretty lengthy. Whilst thanking him for his enthusiasm and helpfulness, you wonder is it just corona virus craziness that has […]

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