I come with good news to you today, news that some of you may have waited for your life:


Yes, that’s the news. Masturbation is the fashion of the day, the trend activity that you can and should be doing right now.  Perhaps for the first time in your life, you are being given permission to engage in a sexual activity that you have been doing since you were a kid.

Up to now your masturbation may have been shamed and forbidden by your religious bodies, family, culture, peers, and educators. No longer!

This permission is not just from me – even though this does carry weight as I am a Clinical Sexologist and it’s my job to give people permission based on good evidence-based research that proves how healthy masturbation is for you.  Especially in times of heightened anxiety, taking oneself in hand, and releasing through to orgasm, is just the kind of hormonal bath of pleasure you require right now.

Global Health Organisations such as the WHO (World Health Organisation) and the CDC (Centre for Diseases Control) state that masturbation is the safest sexual activity that all of us should be engaging in now. Coronavirus cannot be transmitted through self-love – self-love that requires 20 seconds of handwashing before you begin to go solo.

Now think about it, if at this time these hefty world health organizations are promoting masturbation as your safest form of sex, there has to be some significance in it for you personally. Right? Oh yes!


  • Have an agreement with your partner that masturbation is the primary acceptable form of sexual contact.
  • Other sexual consensual sexual contact is fabulous if both of you are COVID virus-negative – masturbation is an additional form of sexual activity that you can both give yourselves permission to enjoy.
  • Agreements that each of you has the right to masturbate alone and in private, is essential. Often times masturbation – and definitely masturbation with porn – is seen as a serious betrayal.
  • No secret masturbation as this is a driver to more conflict. And in lockdown you want to minimize potential conflict situations
  • Please use lube… do not use your own saliva.
  • Taking time to masturbate ensures private time for you – you need this during lockdown
  • Masturbation also gives you a sense of control and authority over your own body. This feeling is much needed at a time when we feel we have no control over our lives.
  • Great idea and added variety, is to masturbate side by side with your partner.
  • Mutual masturbation really comes into its own now. Penetration can be so pressurizing – having to get and keep an erection and having to stay lubricated and pain – free during penetration, can be a real burden #Lube #Nosaliva.
  • Sex toys – ooh la la – of course! Wash your sex toys in soapy warm water, 20 seconds, and wash them afterwards the same way.
  • Do not share sex toys

In summary this is a wonderful time to explore your sexuality on your own. I invite women who are yet to become orgasmic, women who feel out of touch with their sexual selves, to grab the time and opportunity to indulge in this activity of self-pleasuring.


My amazing colleague Dr Paul Joannides, USA based research psycho-analyst, author of the best-seller “The Guide to Getting it On” (on the syllabus of most every USA college curriculum) produces these fantastic sexuality educational videos. Enjoy this video on Female Masturbation.




“How to make pandemics optional, not inevitable” By Sonia Shah, Science Historian and Author, TED TALK



Feel free to reach out to me via Whatsapp. Anonymity is guaranteed.  Let me know where your anxieties, fears and worries sit with you. Tell me what is soothing for you.  And what you need in this time of radical uncertainty.

060 890 1062

Feel free to book a tele-therapy Skype session with me right here …. https://www.dreve.co.za/appointment/

For more information please contact my PA Shantel: shantel@dreve.co.za


Take care

Marlene #stayhome