You simply cannot avoid relationship trauma. Perhaps you’re balking as you read the words “relationship” and “trauma ” in the same sentence. – or sighing with relief as you resonate with this. After all relationships are supposed to be our ideal spiritual home, the place we strive towards as a sacred ambition . Relationships are supposed to bring us ultimate…
Confession : I speak from a place of complete ignorance. I have never had marijuana induced sex. I have tried. Believe me , I have tried. Back in the day , like pre September 2018 when marijuana became legalised in South Africa, I attempted to smoke weed pre sex. But alas, since I have chosen to completely avoid smoking nicotine…
It’s one of the great ironies of my world: vibrators are proven to be the most effective means for women to achieve orgasm . Yet they are seen as less acceptable and desirable than other means of achieving orgasm . Perhaps it is the traditional and patriarchal belief that a man has to be the one who gives his woman…
When the call for help first came in , I had to take a moment and breathe. A few days earlier a young boy of 16 years old had told his father, whilst driving home from soccer practice, that his mother had been sexually abusing him since he was 12 years old. He wanted me to tell him what to…
When I watch porn I have to consciously silence the critic in me and try be present with the purpose of porn : entertainment to arouse the many millions who watch it daily. I acknowledge and even enjoy the healthy, recreational benefits of porn that promotes a positive permissive environment and opportunities for couples to actually communicate their pleasures…
There are two major , and overlapping, themes that emerge in my therapy room : sexuality and money. He will present with an erection difficulty or early ejaculation and she will express no desire for sexuality. Disagreements over money are one of the top causes of couple fights and divorce. We feel shame, and this shame prevents us getting financially…
How are you feeling today ? Sad, bad, mad, glad, neutral, numb…. ? How many hours/days/months/years has it been that you have been hanging around in Heartbreak Hotel? Tell me the reason for your BreakUp ? And who did the breaking?? Was it mutually agreed upon , or only one sided? Shudder as I recall my Break Ups, from divorce…
“I, ___, take thee, ___, to be my wedded husband/wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I pledge thee my faith [or] pledge myself to you.” You…
A few months ago , acclaimed German artist and visual activist SaySay.Love reached out and invited me to consider creating an event for his upcoming Exhibition, “Intimate Loneliness /Sex with Things”, at the Gus Gallery, Stellenbosch , 30th January. Like a well trained automated bot, I reached for my device and googled. And did an In Real Life “wow” when I…